Anyway…

The article is Your Marriage Is More Important Than Your Kids.  When I was married, I heard this again and again…but could never come to terms with it.  How could anything or anyone be more important than our kids?  They were KIDS, for pete’s sake…they needed to be taken care of 24/7.  My husband was an adult..and their father…surely he felt the same way I did…and if he didn’t (and he didn’t), then he’d just have to grow up and OUR turn would come after the “children” years were behind us.  Does that thought process sound familiar to anyone?  Perhaps yes and perhaps no…but it was my thought process all the same.

Now, I get it.  Perhaps I was the one who needed to grow up before I could fully understand.

Making my husband and marriage more of a priority than our kids did NOT mean neglecting our kids.  It simply meant making more time for my husband and our marriage.  Of course…as the article points out…sometimes we make our kids a higher priority because we use them as a means of avoiding our spouse.  My husband and I disagreed about many things, so there was probably avoidance going on..

Sigh.  If only I had fully understood that making our relationship the top priority was absolutely the best thing we could do for our children.  However, I guess I was in denial to a certain extent or, more probably, just very naive.  I took for granted that my husband would hang in there…no matter what.

At any rate, I agree with what this article has to say and I hope it might help someone who happens upon this blog and either has not yet divorced or is remarried.

Forgive me if this article causes anyone pain…I’m hoping that it might help someone to avoid this mistake and, as a result, avoid divorce…and the pain that brings.

May God bless and bring you peace.

Manya

My mother. 1922 - 2010

The reason I’m writing this particular post is to let you know that my family has had a sad loss recently.  My mother died one week ago today.  She was 88.  She is missed by my dad (who is 89…they were married for 68 years!!!), 5 of their 6 children (one of my sisters died of cancer over 20 years ago and I’m sure she’s delighted to be with Mom again ), and over 50 grandchildren and great grandchildren!!

A testament to my mom was the fact that over 20 of her grandchildren came from far and wide to be at her funeral. That surprised and delighted me…and made for one very full house for most of last week…and happily so.  It was the perfect example of that old saying, “When God closes a door, somewhere he opens a window.”  What I mean is…as sad as it was to lose my mother, it was wonderful to spend time with my siblings and their children…and their children’s children.  As a result, we’re now planning a family reunion!

If you would…I ask that you keep my parents in your prayers.  My father is doing better than I ever imagined he would but, of course, after over 68 years together, he misses my mother terribly.

God bless you and bring you peace.

Manya

Regina Doman's newest book

I’m a big fan of Regina Doman’s books. I’ve read them all, including her most recent – Alex O’Donnell and the 40 Cyber Thieves.

Her books are written for teens…girls, specifically.  Each book includes mystery, intrigue, danger…and undercurrents of Catholicism.   They are not highly intellectual but they’re fun and a pleasant distraction.

This latest book is all about cyber thieves and, as usual, has a romance woven into it, along with danger and heroism and faith.  What’s not to like?!

I highly recommend it (and all of Regina’s other books) to any teen girl, her older sisters, and her mother .  They’re ideal for summer reading!  If you haven’t yet read any of her books, though, I suggest starting with the 1st one (The Shadow of the Bear) and reading them in order.

Enjoy!

Manya

P.S.  Here are the titles, in order, of Regina Doman’s books…so far.

The Shadow of the Bear (my favorite)

Black As Night

Waking Rose

The Midnight Dancers (I also particularly liked this one)

Yesterday’s show topic was about dating and intimacy after divorce. This is a HUGE “issue” for us…

• Is dating okay after divorce and without having received a Declaration of Nullity?
  
• Is dating okay during separation?
  
• How about intimacy? The world tells us to be intimate with someone as soon as possible as a way of healing your hurt psyche and “get on with life.”
  

But IS that the best way to go?!

What about our faith?

Do I now have to be alone and celibate for the rest of my life???

But my spouse chose to throw our marriage away and divorce me…why should I be punished for that????

Yep…been there done that…and I didn’t have Lisa Duffy and Vince Frese of Divorced Catholic to help me to answer those tough questions…but YOU do!

Just click on the Blog Talk Radio box in the left column of this page and you can then click on the episode you’d like to listen to. And try to listen to the show live when you can so you can ask Lisa, Vince and their guests questions. Use this tremendous resource that is available to you…it’s truly a blessing.

May God bless and bring you peace.

Manya

We are pleased to announce the Journey of Hope Radio show on BlogTalkRadio.Com beginning Wednesday, June 30th, 2010 at 9:00AM EST!

There is a great need for an ongoing discussion regarding the challenges divorced Catholic men and women face, and through this program we hope to engage our distinguished guests and listeners in an informative and supportive conversation. Our goal is to provide you with accurate information and support as you deal with the process and aftermath of divorce.

Our first guest will be Fr. Thomas Williams, LC, back by popular demand from his appearance as Keynote Speaker at the Journey of Hope 2010 Conference last February. Fr. Thomas, Vince, and I will be eager to take your calls! The call-in number for the show is 1(347)989-1231.

Perhaps the best part about the show is that it is recorded, so if you are unable to listen live you can always visit our show page at http://www.blogtalkradio.com/journeyofhoperadio and listen to the recorded podcast!

We ask for your prayers for the success of the program and look forward to taking your calls on June 30th at 9:00am EST!

Sincerely,
Lisa Duffy, DivorcedCatholic.Org

Be sure to put this on your calendar and listen. It’s going to be good!  Actually, go to the blog talk radio link and you can have them send you a reminder in any of four different ways! Too cool.  Also, remember that if you can’t listen live, you can access the recording afterwards.

May God bless and bring you peace,
Manya

Since my world at the moment is “Water, Water Everywhere,” I thought it’d be an appropriate Sunday to share the following video with you.

That Catholic Show is great (in my humble opinion)…just wish they could find time to continue the series!  By the way, Jennifer & Greg Willits can now be found on the Catholic Channel at Sirius radio – The Catholics Next Door.

God bless and bring you peace!
Manya

New Legislation Helps Minnesotans Reconcile Marriages

I hope and pray that more states follow….

Manya

This is the day we celebrate the birth of the Catholic Church because it’s the day that the Holy Spirit descended on the Apostles, who were terrified after the crucifixion and locked themselves in a room.  After the Holy Spirit entered their lives, they had courage and strength of faith and went out into the world to proclaim the church.  This is truly a day to celebrate.  Also, it’s a great example of how the Holy Spirit can help each of us. Pray to the Holy Spirit that he will bless you with His gifts…only a few of which are strength, courage and perseverance.  There are many other gifts to be received from Him!

Yeah, I think we can all use that kind of help…especially through such difficult times as separation and divorce.

May the Holy Spirit bless you!

Manya

Awakening by Claudi Cangilla McAdam

This is a small book (149 pages) that helps you to see the last days of Christ on earth “up close and personal,” through the eyes of a teenage girl.

To be honest, it took me a while to get into it. The last chapter, though, was brilliant (in my opinion). My 25 yo daughter, on the other hand, liked it from page 1.

In a nutshell, this is a story told by a teenage girl (Veronica) who lives in the present day with her mother. Her father and brother had been killed fairly recently. Her mother is a devout Catholic but Veronica is a skeptic. Through some trick of fate, Veronica finds herself, her mother and her close friends transported to Jerusalem, 2000 yrs ago. It seems that she had been born and raised in that long ago time and place, however, she remembers that she’s actually from the 21st century. This is indeed an interesting predicament to find yourself in!

As it happens, it is Holy Week in Jerusalem…the original Holy Week. Veronica meets the people behind the names we have all come to know, including Jesus.

This book is good for any age starting with about 12 years old. It’s target is probably about 13 through 16 years.  And, since it’s a story told through the eyes of a teenage girl, a young boy probably wouldn’t be too interested unless it’s read aloud to the family. It would be especially good reading during Lent as a way of visualizing how the events unfolded and what the people were really like…as well as why it all happened.

Have you or one of your children read this? If so, please let us know YOUR opinion.

Manya

This review was written as part of the Catholic book Reviewer program from The Catholic Company. Visit The Catholic Company to find more information on Awakening.

Manya