Yesterday’s show topic was about dating and intimacy after divorce. This is a HUGE “issue” for us…

• Is dating okay after divorce and without having received a Declaration of Nullity?
  
• Is dating okay during separation?
  
• How about intimacy? The world tells us to be intimate with someone as soon as possible as a way of healing your hurt psyche and “get on with life.”
  

But IS that the best way to go?!

What about our faith?

Do I now have to be alone and celibate for the rest of my life???

But my spouse chose to throw our marriage away and divorce me…why should I be punished for that????

Yep…been there done that…and I didn’t have Lisa Duffy and Vince Frese of Divorced Catholic to help me to answer those tough questions…but YOU do!

Just click on the Blog Talk Radio box in the left column of this page and you can then click on the episode you’d like to listen to. And try to listen to the show live when you can so you can ask Lisa, Vince and their guests questions. Use this tremendous resource that is available to you…it’s truly a blessing.

May God bless and bring you peace.

Manya

I did a google search and found one that seems to fit SO well.  She’s also a very interesting woman.  I’d like to find a good book on her, so if you know of one, please don’t keep it to yourself!

The following is from AmericanCatholic.org….

St. Helen (249-329) found the True Cross in Jerusalem and, for many centuries, devotion to St. Helen has been linked to devotion to the Holy Cross. It would be hard to find a painting, statue or holy card of her that does not depict her embracing the cross.

But there is another, sadder facet of Helen’s life. After 22 years of marriage, Helen’s husband, Constantius, divorced her in order to make a politically advantageous marriage with a young woman who was a member of Rome’s imperial family.

Clearly, St. Helen would be a natural choice as patron of divorced and divorcing people, so why has this devotion to her arisen only recently? For most of the 1,700 years since Helen’s death, divorce was rare, even among non-Catholics. Among Catholics it was almost unthinkable. Today, unfortunately, when divorce has become commonplace, St. Helen is offered to unhappy spouses as a heavenly patron who can truly sympathize with their anguish.

Helen was also the mother of the Roman emperor, Constantine, who was the first Christian Roman emperor.  He is also a saint.

Well…who could be a more perfect patron saint for us?  Not only did she experience the horrors of divorce… then go on to be declared a saint… but she raised a son who has also been declared a saint!!  She sounds to me like she was an amazing woman in many respects.

I found a holy card that can be purchased from The Shrine of Our Lady of Czestochowa, which is in Pennsylvania.  The prayer on the card is also just perfect for us:

Holy and blessed Saint Helen,

with the anguish and devotion with which You sought the Cross of Christ,

I plead that You give me God’s grace to suffer in patience the labours of this life,

so that through them and through your intercession and protections,

I will be able to seek and carry the Cross, which God has placed on me,

so that I can serve Him in this life and enjoy His Glory ever after.  Amen

If you have any tidbits of information about St. Helen to share with us, please do!!

May God bless and bring you peace.

St. Helen, pray for us.

Manya

P.S.  The image of a statue of St. Helen shows an old woman because it’s believed that she was in her 80′s when she found the cross!  Can you imagine being in your 80′s back in the late 200′s!  Truly an amazing woman…

Day 9 Intention: Souls who have become lukewarm.

Today bring to Me the souls who have become lukewarm* and immerse them in the abyss of My mercy.  These souls wound My Heart most painfully.  My soul suffered the most dreadful loathing in the Garden of Olives because of lukewarm souls.  They were the reason I cried out: ‘Father, take this cup away from Me, if it be Your will.’  For them the last hope of salvation is to run to My mercy.

“Most compassionate Jesus, You are Compassion Itself.  I bring lukewarm souls into the abode of Your Most Compassionate Heart.  In this fire of Your pure love let these tepid souls, who, like corpses, filled You with such deep loathing, be once again set aflame.  O Most Compassionate Jesus, exercie the omnipotence of Your mercy and draw them into the very ardor of Your love, and bestow upon them the gift of holy love, for nothing is beyond Your power.

Eternal Father, turn Your merciful gaze upon lukewarm souls who are nonetheless enfolded in the Most Compassionate Hear of Jesus.  Father of Mercy, I beg You by the bitter Passion of Your Son and by His theree-hour agony on the Cross: Let them, too, glorify the abyss of Your mercy.  Amen.”

This is a chaplet, which means there’s a series of prayers to be said and you can use a rosary to help keep track:

Recite the following:

The Our Father

The Hail Mary

The Apostles’ Creed

On the large beads (Our Father beads):

Eternal Father, I offer You the Body and Blood, Soul and Divinity of Your dearly beloved Son, Our Lord Jesus Christ, in atonement for our sins and those of the whole world.

On the small beads (Hail Mary beads):

For the sake of His sorrowful Passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world.

Continue those prayers around the entire rosary, always meditating on the intention for today. Then say the following three times:

Holy God, Holy Mighty One, Holy Immortal One, have mercy on us and on the whole world.

Done!  I hope this has been helpful to you.

*By the way, here’s the definition of “lukewarm souls” directly from Jesus to St. Faustina: “There are souls who thwart My efforts…souls without love or devotion, souls full of egoism and selfishness, proud and arrogant souls full of deceit and hypocrisy, lukewarm souls who have hardly enough warmth to keep themselves alive.  My Heart cannot bear it.  All my graces that I pour down on them daily flow off them as off rock.  I cannot bear them because they are neither good nor bad.”

Day 8 Intention: The souls who are detained in Purgatory.

Today bring to Me the souls who are detained in Purgatory and immerse them in the abyss of My mercy.  Let the torrents of My Blood cool down their scorching flames.  All these souls are greatly loved by Me.  They are making retribution fo My justice.  It is in your power to bring them relief.  Draw all the indulgences from the treasury of My Church and offer them on their behalf.  Oh, if you only knew the torments they suffer, you would continually offer for them the alms of the spirit and pay off their debt to My justice.

“Most Merciful Jesus, You Yourself have said that You desire mercy; so I bring into the abode of Your Most Compassionate Heart the souls in Purgatory, souls who are very dear to You, and yet, who must make retribution to Your justice.  May the streams of Blood and Water which gushed forth from Your Heart put out the flames of Purgatory, that there, too, the power of Your mercy may be celebrated.

Eternal Father, turn Your merciful gaze upon the souls suffering in Purgatory, who are enfolded in the Most Compassionate Heart of Jesus.  I beg You, by the sorrowful Passion of Jesus Your Son, and by all the bitterness with which His most sacred Soul was flooded: Manifest Your mercy to the souls who are under Your just scrutiny.  Look upon them in no other way but only through the Wounds of Jesus, Your dearly beloved Son; for we firmly believe that there is no limit to Your goodness and compassion.  Amen.”

This is a chaplet, which means there’s a series of prayers to be said and you can use a rosary to help keep track:

Recite the following:

The Our Father

The Hail Mary

The Apostles’ Creed

On the large beads (Our Father beads):

Eternal Father, I offer You the Body and Blood, Soul and Divinity of Your dearly beloved Son, Our Lord Jesus Christ, in atonement for our sins and those of the whole world.

On the small beads (Hail Mary beads):

For the sake of His sorrowful Passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world.

Continue those prayers around the entire rosary, always meditating on the intention for today. Then say the following three times:

Holy God, Holy Mighty One, Holy Immortal One, have mercy on us and on the whole world.

Done…til tomorrow.

Day 7 Intention: The souls who especially venerate and glorify My mercy.

Today bring to Me the souls who especially venerate and glorify My mercy and immerse them in My mercy.  These souls sorrowed most over My passion and entered most deeply into My spirit.  They are living images of My Compassionate Heart.  These souls will shine with a special brightness in the next life.  Not one of them will go into the fire of hell.  I shall particularly defend each one of them at the hour of death.

“Most Merciful Jesus, whose Heart is Love Itself, receive into the abode of Your Most Compassionate Heart the souls of those who particularly extol and venerate the greatness of Your mercy.  These souls are mighty with the very power of God Himself.  in the midst of all afflictions and adverstities they go forward, confident of Your mercy; and united to You, O Jesus, they carry all mankind on their shoulders.  These souls will not be judges severely, but Your mercy will embrace them as they depart from this life.

Eternal Father, turn Your merciful gaze upon the souls who glorify and venerate Your greatest attribute, that of Your fathomless mercy, and who are enclosed in the Most Compassionate Heart of Jesus.  These souls are a living Gospel; their hands are full of deeds of mercy, and their hearts, overflowing with joy, sing a canticle of mercy to You, O Most High!  I beg You O God: Show them Your mercy according to the hope and trust they have placed in You.  Let there be accomplished in them the promise of Jesus, who said to them that during their life, but especially at the hour of death, the souls who will venerate this fathomless mercy of His, He, Himself, will defend as His glory.  Amen.”

This is a chaplet, which means there’s a series of prayers to be said and you can use a rosary to help keep track:

Recite the following:

The Our Father

The Hail Mary

The Apostles’ Creed

On the large beads (Our Father beads):

Eternal Father, I offer You the Body and Blood, Soul and Divinity of Your dearly beloved Son, Our Lord Jesus Christ, in atonement for our sins and those of the whole world.

On the small beads (Hail Mary beads):

For the sake of His sorrowful Passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world.

Continue those prayers around the entire rosary, always meditating on the intention for today. Then say the following three times:

Holy God, Holy Mighty One, Holy Immortal One, have mercy on us and on the whole world.

Done…til tomorrow.

Today is the 6th day of the Divine Mercy Novena.    Many amazing promises are attached to this novena. I encourage you to go to a Catholic bookstore to pick up a Divine Mercy pamphlet that tells you the story behind it, too, so you can keep the prayers with you and not be tied to the computer while reciting them.

Day 6 Intention: The meek and humble souls and the souls of little children

Today bring to Me the meek and humble souls and the souls of little children and immerse them in My mercy.  These souls most closely resemble My Heart.  They strengthened Me during My bitter agony.  I saw them as earthly Angels, who will keep vigil at My altars.  I pour out upon them whole torrents of grace.  Only the humble soul is capable of receiving My grace.  I favor humble souls with My confidence.

“Most Merciful Jesus, You yourself have said, ‘Learn from Me for I am meek and humble of heart.’ Receive into the abode of Your Most Compassionate Heart all meek and humble souls and the souls of little children.  These souls send all heaven into ecstasy and they are the heavenly Father’s favorites.  They are a sweet-smelling bouquet before the throne of God; God himself take delight in their fragrance.  These souls have a permanent abode in Your Most Compassionate Heart, O Jesus, and they undeasingly sing out a hymn of love and mercy.

Eternal Father, turn Your merciful gaze upon meek souls, upon humble souls, and upon little children who are enfolded in the abode which is the Most Compassionate Heart of Jesus.  These souls bear the closest resemblance to Your Son.  Their fragrance rises from the eathe and raches Your very throne.  Father of mercy and of all goodness, I beg You by the love You bear these souls and by the delight You take in them: Bless the whole world, that all souls together may sing out the praises of Your mercy for endless ages.  Amen.”

This is a chaplet, which means there’s a series of prayers to be said and you can use a rosary to help keep track:

Recite the following:

The Our Father

The Hail Mary

The Apostles’ Creed

On the large beads (Our Father beads):

Eternal Father, I offer You the Body and Blood, Soul and Divinity of Your dearly beloved Son, Our Lord Jesus Christ, in atonement for our sins and those of the whole world.

On the small beads (Hail Mary beads):

For the sake of His sorrowful Passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world.

Continue those prayers around the entire rosary, always meditating on the intention for today. Then say the following three times:

Holy God, Holy Mighty One, Holy Immortal One, have mercy on us and on the whole world.

Done…til tomorrow.

(An important point…The novena of Divine Mercy leads up to the Feast of Divine Mercy.  They’re actually separate. It’s not necessary to pray the novena in order to celebrate & receive the blessings of the Feast of Divine Mercy. Of course, though, praying the novena is highly recommended!)

If you haven’t had a chance to read up on the story behind The Divine Mercy Novena and the blessings/promises attached to it and, also,  (more importantly) the celebration of the Feast of Mercy, let me tell you some important things…

First of all, the following (and so much more) was revealed to Sister Faustina Kowalska, who is now St. Faustina. Click on that link to learn more about her, the novena and Mercy Sunday.

The Feast of Mercy is the Sunday after Easter. Christ instituted this feast in order to offer each of us a fresh start…and what He has promised is truly stunning.  The following are the words He spoke to St. Faustina:

I want to grant a complete pardon to the souls that will go to Confession and receive Holy Communion on the Feast of My mercy.

Whoever approaches the Fountain of Life on this day will be granted complete forgiveness of sins and punishment.

If that didn’t fully sink in, read it again. COMPLETE forgiveness of sins AND punishment. That is huge!  (Of course, a complete and sincere confession needs to be made.)

It is not necessary to go to confession on the feast day itself. Actually we’re encouraged to go before this Sunday…even before Holy Week…so that there will not be an overwhelmingly
large number of people seeking confession on one day.

The Lord also insists that we be merciful ourselves!  Again, His words to St. Faustina:

Yes, the first Sunday after Easter is the Feast of Mercy, but there must also be acts of mercy…I demand from you deeds of mercy, which are to arise out of love for Me.  You are to show mercy to your neighbors always and everywhere. You must not shrink from this
or try to excuse or absolve yourself from it.

This may be the hardest part of this novena for those of us who have experienced or are experiencing divorce and the pains brought upon us and our children by our spouses!  It is NOT easy to forgive the one who vowed to love and remain faithful to you forever.  The one who is supposed to be your shelter from pain and troubles in your life.  The one who may have betrayed and hurt you in a way that NO other in this world is capable of.  Believe me, I know this.  It takes time and practice to be able to forgive your spouse for such things…and to be able to forgive the other person, IF there was another person involved in the destruction of your relationship.

God is asking, demanding actually, that we show mercy in exchange for His showing mercy to us.  That makes sense.  However, I think God will understand if you’re not able to completely forgive your spouse
just yet.  Simply start working on it with a genuine desire to be able to forgive him/her.  And, of course, show mercy in other areas of your life, too. AND, please don’t forget to show mercy to yourself!  Yes…sometimes we need to be able to forgive ourselves, too….sometimes more often than we’d care to admit.  Actually, in my experience, it wasn’t until I was able to fully acknowledge my part in the death of our relationship that I was able to really start forgiving my ex-husband – and myself.

So, here are all the steps to properly observing the Feast of Mercy: (taken from The Divine Mercy Message and Devotion)

1. Celebrate the Feast on the Sunday after Easter

2. Sincerely repent of all our sins;

3. Place our complete trust in Jesus;

4. Go to Confession, preferably before that Sunday;

5. Receive Holy Communion on the day of the Feast;

6. Venerate* the Image of The Divine Mercy;

7. Be merciful to others, through our actions, words, and prayers on their behalf.

*To venerate a sacred image or statue simply means to perform some act or make some gesture of deep religious respect toward it because of the person whom it represents.

Notice that in order to obtain the promises of Christ attached to celebrating The Feast of Mercy, it is NOT necessary to have participated in the novena.  So if you have not been praying the novena, please don’t let that stop you from celebrating this feast this coming Sunday.  Some parishes focus on this feast on Mercy Sunday…others (sadly) don’t even acknowledge it.  It’s not necessary for your parish to hold special celebrations in order for YOU to celebrate the feast.  Simply follow the 7 steps above on your own, individually.

God bless us all and bring us peace (and mercy!).

Manya

Today is St. Joseph’s Feast Day….and even though today is a Friday in Lent, it is NOT a day of fast and/or abstinence …it’s a day of joy and feasting.  That means that you can eat meat today.  Really.  Why?  Because this isn’t “just” a feast day, it’s a “solemnity.”  That makes it on par with Sunday, which also is never a day of fast and/or abstinence. (see Scott’s Catholicism Blog )

Until fairly recently in my life, I didn’t realize there were such days during lent – Fridays when you could eat meat!  I also didn’t know that Sundays were not counted as a part of Lent, for much the same reason.  Sundays are feast days…days to be joyful…not days on which to do penance.   Sigh…so much to learn, so little time.

Back to St. Joseph, though.  Pray to him today.  There’s so much we divorced, Catholic moms can ask of him – so much he can do for us:

St. Joseph – selfless husband and protector of Mary and father of Jesus:

1. Please pray for my (ex)husband and guide him.

2. Please pray for, support and guide me – a single mother.

3. Please pray for, support and guide my children, whose father has left.

4. Please pray for our family, which is broken.

Here is a video about St. Joseph that is interesting:

And you can learn some more interesting things about St. Joseph over on Addlebook Rambles.

I wonder why we know so little about St. Joseph…it’s interesting to think about.  I wonder what lesson God wants us to learn from Joseph and the way his life was in the shadows.

I think that Joseph’s life was pretty difficult and must have been very frustrating at times.  The poor man found out that his wife was pregnant …and not with his child.  But he consented to be her husband to raise Jesus as his own.  Then there’s the fact that Mary remained a virgin.   None of that would be easy for Joseph by any stretch of the imagination.  There’s no doubt that this man was a saint.  But why was so little said about him in the bible?  “It’s a puzzlement.”  (that’s from a musical…do you know which one?  It has nothing to do with St. Joseph…I’m just easily distracted. )

Enjoy St. Joseph’s Feast Day!  And remember to pray to St. Joseph always, but especially while you and your children are going through this painful time in your lives…. and especially today on his feast day!

Manya

I highly recommend that you check out Coming Home Catholic.  It’s a great place to go for information and direction when it comes to teaching your children about our fantastic faith.  It’s also a great place to go to teach yourself more about our faith….

Here’s a link to today’s newsletter – Coming Home Catholic Newsletter

Be sure to sign up to receive the newsletter each week via email.  The family who writes it really knows the Catholic faith and how to make it easy to understand….and how to thoroughly understand it!  Follow some of their links and see where they take you.  It’s pretty awesome.

Have a lovely Friday…and may God bless you and bring you peace.

Manya

Here it is August – the month when probably most of the people in the world go on vacation.

I just wanted to remind you of an awesome website where you can find churches and mass times for most anywhere in the world.

Sooooo……there’s no need to miss mass while you’re on vacation.

There are legitimate reasons to miss mass, like when you’re sick or when there is no way you can get to a church on Saturday evening or Sunday morning or on a Holy Day of Obligation because…well, there’s more than one reason why someone might not be able to get to a mass. However, simply being on vacation is not a legitimate reason for missing mass.

Actually, being on vacation is a really good time to visit new churches and have new experiences. Also, when I was young, my mom told me that whenever you visit a church you’ve never been in before, you should say three Hail Mary’s and make a special request.

Going to mass while on vacation is also an excellent way to show your children how important it is to follow the precepts of the church at all times. (For more on that, see Keeping Catholicism in the Home After Divorce) And remember…not fulfilling your Sunday or Holy Day of Obligation obligations simply because it’s inconvenient to do so (i.e. you don’t really feel like it) is a grave sin (i.e. a mortal sin). It surprises me how many Catholics don’t know that….

Anyway – here’s that site for you. Mass Times.

Have a marvelous time on vacation and store up
lots of wonderful memories!

Manya